Campaign Launch: Blue Cross/Palin 2012

Many billionaires reside in the Silicon Valley city of Palo Alto. From Lytton Plaza in Palo Alto's tony downtown, Eunice Wentworth made the following announcement today.

First, let me say how happy we are with the recent Supreme Court decision that ruled that corporations have equal rights with humans. Blue Cross will become the first corporation to serve as president of our nation.

Sarah Palin needs no introduction. She is doing a grand job of convincing those wonderful members of the hoi polloi, the Teabaggers, to shoot themselves in the foot and support a platform that preserves the wealth of us few.

As members of the wealthiest 0.001% of the population we are a tiny minority, but we have a way of making our influence felt. Our most profitable investment has been the many elected officials who rely on our largesse to buy airtime to run ads to get elected so they can do our bidding. Now that the Supreme Court has ruled that corporations are people too, we are proud to be able to support the ticket of Blue Cross for US President and Sarah Palin for Vice-President in 2012.

Bertha Gotrocks then took the microphone and outlined the ticket's platform:

The goal of our ticket is to preserve American privatizing of everything. If elected we will fight socialism by abolishing public education, Social Security and Medicare. We will overturn the recent healthcare measures, abolish all environmental regulations and solve the immigration question by building a wall around the entire United States. As for education, our children and youth can be more appropriately trained by the military to be ready to fight in ongoing wars for oil. It is our aim to establish corporate power in all areas of what is currently referred to as government, thereby reducing taxes, especially OUR taxes.

To the chorus of a rounding huzzah, Eunice then raised a glass of bubbly, saying, Remember our motto:
Ask not what corporations can do for you, ask what YOU can do for corporations.

Reactions to the Palo Alto campaign launch were varied. Of course the gathered Billionaires were thrilled that such a grand duo has been selected for the important election of 2012. The lunch hour in Palo Alto draws many fine people (made wealthy by the power of the working class) to eating and drinking establishments, and they registered pleasure at the thought that they will be able to count on capitalists to keep them from having to work. From behind glasses of wine and champagne, the Billionaires looked down upon the workers who frequent the city's downtown area as they rush to and from jobs that keep them waiting upon the rich and answering to their corporate masters.

Members of the working class waved from cars along busy University Ave. Most were in oil consuming large vehicles, the Billionaires observed with satisfaction. Many of those forced to walk the streets, as they have no servants or limo drivers to attend to them, shot photos with quaint little electronic devices they call "cell phones". (The billionaires themselves are not familiar with such things as their maids, butlers, and social secretaries handle all their calls). The streets were littered with little people, many of whom displayed an appalling lack of breeding, noted Bertha. Coming upon the Billionaires with their campaign slogan placards, they made such inquiries and comments as:

Are you for real? Do you think that privatizing everything will work? Do you really LIKE Sarah Palin? Is this an April Fool's joke?